Report: UFI readings at unprecedented level

i always seem to have the urge to blog at the most inopportune times. however, regardless of the fact that i have an exam i am ridiculously unprepared for tomorrow morning, i need to share something with you all. it may be a bit of a waste of my short-lived caffiene buzz, but, i'll do it anyway!

i have made a discovery while studying here at my beloved UTSC. being the studious little bunny i am, studying here on a surprisingly temperate sunday afternoon, it has been brought to my attention that apparently there is an unmistakable influx of ugliness at UTSC on the weekends. perhaps i am generalizing, i mean i suppose i can't really speak for saturday when i make this claim, but i stand by it nonetheless.

UFI [ugliness factor index] readings are through the roof on this unsuspecting sunday. there are ugly people EVERYWHERE. seemingly innumerable ugly people who dress ugly, eat ugly, smell ugly have somehow infiltrated the school, and are in every corner, every nook and yes, every cubicle.

now, i know i'm not one to comment on the subject of ugliness [specifically, the dressing ugly part...or the ugly hair part] but if even i took notice, there is definitely something wrong with this picture. in the VERY long line-up for tim horton's, i saw people i have never seen here before, people dressed in pyjamas, people wearing extremely ill-fitting t-shirts and track pants, people, with a complete lack of care or interest in their personal presentation. i know that UTSC is typically an ugly school, with nothing to look at especially in comparison to york [in terms of architecture AND individuals], but today is simply ridiculous and inexcusable.

given, a certain degree of ugliness during this especially horrendous exam period is acceptable. showering unfortunately, becomes optional [FOR SOME...myself of course, not included]. hair maintenance is at a minimum. and dress is by far, at the bottom of the barrel. but there needs to be a line drawn at some point. and whatever happened to UTSC police kicking out UofT wannabes out of the school? the aunties and uncles [some genunine, some just look like they could be] are lowering our standards, which, although meagre, are standards nonetheless.

your interest in this increasingly alarming status of UTSC is appreciated. updates will be posted on the aesthetic appeal of the school and its students as they become available. we are hopeful that there will be improvements to report, but this is only possible with your help. here are some ways you can show your support:

-SHOWER
-BRUSH YOUR HAIR
-WEAR RELATIVELY CLEAN CLOTHING
-WEAR RELATIVELY WELL-FITTING CLOTHING
-DON'T CHEW WITH YOUR DAMN MOUTH OPEN
-DON'T SMILE AT NOTHING WHEN YOU'RE BY YOURSELF [creeps me out]

thanks you for your concern. now back to your regularly scheduled study time.